Monday, September 26, 2005

unexpected blessings

This weekend was wonderful. God and i had some great time together. He really showed me a lot about myself. I came back to have a wonderful night last night. Despite, rather because of the difficult time i was experiencing last week, God was able to reveal more of Himself and myself to me. It is amazing what can be done through trials. I received some unexpected blessings.

this is my last post on this blog....i am changing formats.....hope you will enjoy the new design.............

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

a few simple words

a few simple words can brighten your day, and a few simple words can darken it.
I realized the importance of being a brightener today because others have been to me. Thanks everyone for listening to me and being there when i'm feeling down. Thanks for caring and loving me, and just knowing that you do. Thanks for believeing in me and encouraging me. You have no clue how much it helps to have friends when i may lose my best friend. I love you guys, friends and my best friend. You all have made a huge impact on my life. Thanks.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

unanswered questions

what to say? life can change in the blink of an eye. my eyes have blinked and i am afraid to open them. i have to wait until they are opened for me. i've tried, but darkness is the only image, thus convincing me i've not opened my eyes at all.
i will wait because love demands it. i will wait because the question at hand remains unanswered while the one on my heart has been assured. "love is 1/4 emotion and 3/4 committment" (-dr. bross) i agree and am in love wholy. all is there, now i wait. wait to hear words of joy or words of destruction. the passing of time is difficult when light and darkness are speratically available. pain in the darkness seems to grow until only one beam of light rests ever so slightly. it then grows becasue darkness cannot overcome the light. this light, this hope is only found when comfort is found in closed eyes. comfort in darkness becasue trust that the light will come and is in fact there still. so, the question remains unanswered, and my eyes remain closed.

Psalm62

My soul finds rest in God alone;
my lasvation comes from him.
He alone is my rock and my
salvation;
he is my fortress, i will never be
shaken

How long will you assault a man?
would all of you throw him dwon--
the leading wall, this tottering fence?
They fully intend to topeel him
from his lofty place;
they take delight in lies.
with their mouths they bless,
but in their hearts they curse.

Find rest, o my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
he alone is my orch and my
salvation
he is my fortress, i will not be
shaken.
My salvation and my honor depend
on God;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
Trust in him at all times, o people;
pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.

Lowborn men are but a breath,
the highnorn are but a lie;
if weighed on a balance, they are nothing;
together they are only a breath.
do not trust in extortion
or take pride in stolen goods;
though your riches increas,
do not set your heart on thm

one thingGod has spoken,
two things have i heard:
that you, o God, are strong,
and that you, o Lord, are loving.
surely you will reward each person according to what he has done.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

lacking sleep....lacking answers...too much guidance?

well, i got three hours of sleep last night. i just got back from my philosophy test and have a systematic theology test here in a little bit. apparantly, i am an idiot. i know better than to trust a study guide, but i did in philosophy. there was a section on the test that no one studied becasue it was not on the study guide. i'm hoping he throws it out because i missed some. it is a sad thing to realize my dependancy on having a study guide.
they baby us here. in the real world we are not going to get the answers we need to know right at our feet. things come up in life that we do not expect, but we can still answer correctly if we have learned from life. we cannot just make a list of 10 vocab and 20 lessons to go to for every question. I am so sad to say that i have done this scholastically, but i am determined to learn from life and not depend on anyone to give me the outline or answers. somethings it is just better to figure out on your own.

Monday, September 05, 2005

hornets from hell!!!

there was an amazing show on Animal Planet the other day about hornets from hell. They are about 2 inches long with a wingspan of 3 inches. quite freaky. anyway, i just thought you may be interested.

sorry for not posting recently....busy busy busy.

we just had Spiritual Emphasis here at SWU and it was great. Between that and all that has been going on with hurrican Katrina, i feel like God is narrowing his call on my life. i am born to serve and help others. i am made to give. i want to be close to people and help them. i am tired of just giving money, i want to actually minister to others in person. i know that giving money and meeting other needs is a wonderful thing. (ive been on the receiving end and it is a such a blessing) but, for my life, i want to get in there and give of my time, my life. i want to throw myself into a cause and be used by God to touch lives, personally. as far as career choices this presents, i still am not 100% certain, but that is alright because i will know in time. my prayer is just that God use me however He will.

Other news, nathan and i have been dating 10 months as of 8/31!!! it has been a wonderful 10 months. through the ups and downs i am thouroughly in love and am more daily. i am truely blessed to be a part of nathan's life and to have him in mine. Thanks nathan for loving me and maintaining integrity and leadership. You are continually teaching me what it is to trust another person and to feel lovely.

sorry if it bothers anyone for me to write to nathan on here, i just wanted him to know i am proud of who he is and i want all to know that he is amazing and i respect and love him incredibly much:) :) :)

Sunday, August 21, 2005

nathan, me, beach wedding...

NOT OURS!!! :) my dad's. Nathan and i went to Charleston this weekend for my dad's wedding. it was great. my dad looked SO handsome and Andrea looked beautiful. My sisters and i cried a little. it really was one of the sweetest things i've ever seen when my dad said vows he actually wrote. we could not hear them, but he was so sweet. CONGRATULATIONS!!!
i went in the ocean and everything. i did have a relapse of fear at first, and i apologize nathan for being frustrated with you because i was a baby. thanks for your patience with me. :) i did go back into the water yesterday and today. it was mad crazy fun. i love the ocean...once i get over being scared. nathan and i went downtown, of course. it was an amazing night from the wedding to the resturant to the sand-fleas on the beach to the bathroom to nearly freezing to death sleeping on the floor with no cover (alone).
We went down to walk on the beach after we got back from downtown and walked. it was a full moon and gorgeous out there. We brought a blanket and sat down after a little while. that did not last long. after about 5 minutes of sitting, we both started to itch incredibly much. we decided it was sand fleas and left, stopping over few yard to scratch our feet and laughing the whole way back. it was fun. :) Nathan, i love you.

Friday, August 12, 2005

back to school!!!

It is wonderful to be home. i realized, this summer was the last time i will live at home, more than likely. i graduate this year and will be on my own after that. So, the closing of the summer is a bitter-sweet time. I will miss my family, but i have another family here. When this year is over, i will be leaving both families. it is a sad thought, but the good thing is that we are all only a phone call or e-mail away.
Summer was great. The hospital internship was very educating. i enjoyed it and will miss the people there.
Well, sorry for the brevity of it all, but i have other fish to fry.

see ya later--looy